Adelaide's Lament - Mandy Moore
The average unmarried female
Basically insecure
Due to some long frustration may react
With psychosomatic symptoms
Difficult to endure
Affecting the upper respiratory tract
In other words
Just from waiting around
For that plain little band of gold
A person can develop a cold
You can spray her
Wherever you figure the streptococci lurk
You can give her a shot for whatever she's got
But it just won't work
If she's tired of getting the fish-eye
From the hotel clerk
A person can develop a cold
It says here:
The female remaining single
Just in the legal sense
Shows a neurotic tendency
See note, Note:
Chronic organic syndromes
Toxic or hyper tense
Involving the eye, the ear, and the nose, and throat
In other words
Just from waiting around
For that plain little band of gold
A person can develop a cold
You can feed her all day with the Vitamin A
And the bromo fizz
But the medicine never gets anywhere
Near where the trouble is
If she's getting a kind of a name for herself
And the name ain't "his"
A person can develop a cold
And further more
Just from stalling and stalling and stalling the wedding trip
A person can develop La Grippe
When they get on the train for Niagara
And she can hear church bells chime
The compartment is air conditioned
And the mood sublime
Then they get off at Saratoga
For the 14th time
A person can develop La Grippe
La Grippe, La post nasal drip
With the wheezes and the sneezes
And a sinus that's really a pip
From the lack of community property
And a feeling she's getting too old
A person can develop a bad, bad, cold!
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